The Father, The Groom

And The Bride

 

Introduction:

 

          There are several concepts in the Scriptures when, if looked at from a Hebrew perspective, can be better understood. The concept of how and why Yahshua is recognized as the groom, and the ecclesia (called out ones) as the bride, is one of those concepts. Before we get into that however, let me share the story of how my relationship with my wife began: I met and dated my wife while we were still in High School. After a few years of courting I asked her to marry me, she accepted, we told our parents and a few years later we were married. However interesting my story may sound, the fact is that it is not unique within this society. Although we may claim some differences, one thing that we all have in common is that none of our marriages were pre-arranged by our parents.

 

The pre-arrangement of marriages was the custom of the day during the Old Testament and actually even during Yahshua’s time. Interestingly enough, this arrangement was part of a larger process that involved the exchanging of monies, called dowries and the giving of gifts. All of these things preceded the big event, the wedding day, in which the bride was given to the groom and they were expected to live together in the grooms’ father’s house. This process of marriage generally involved several phases, which were: The Match, The Bride Price, The Giving of Gifts, The Drawing of a Marriage Contract, The Betrothal and the Nuptials, or Wedding Feast. In this study, we will compare these phases against the terminology and ideology given when referencing the marriage of the Lamb to it’s bride.  The striking similarities between the two will be evident; the hope of course is that after we see these similarities, the plan of how and why the Father chooses the bride for his Son will be better understood. 

 

The Match: (Hebrew Custom)

         

          As we already learned, the marriages of the Old Testament were arranged by the parents, usually the father, or older brother, however, it was not uncommon for the mother to get involved if there was no one else. In many instances the parents would use a middleman, or ruler (master) of the feast (John 2:9-10), whose job was to keep things in order and to make the initial arrangement. He served not only as a witness to the arrangement (contract) but he was essentially a guide to the people and the bride. Gen 24:1-4 shows the fact that Abraham, as the father was the one that decided when it was time for his son Isaac to be married. Another thing that we see is the use of the intercessor that we also mentioned.    

 

1 Abraham was now old and well advanced in years, and Yahweh had blessed him in every way. 2 He said to the chief servant in his household, the one in charge of all that he had, "Put your hand under my thigh. 3 I want you to swear by Yahweh, the Elohim of heaven and the Mighty One of  earth, that you will not get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I am living, 4 but will go to my country and my own relatives and get a wife for my son Isaac."

 

As we read on, we find out that the servant was successful both in finding a wife (Rebecca) for Isaac and also for guiding her back to her groom.

 

Here are a few more examples that show the parents making the marriage arrangements:

 

Gen 21:20-21  Elohim was with the boy [Ishmael] as he grew up. He lived in the desert and became an archer. 21 While he was living in the Desert of Paran, his mother got a wife for him from Egypt.

 

Judg 14:1-2  Samson went down to Timnah and saw there a young Philistine woman. 2 When he returned, he said to his father and mother, "I have seen a Philistine woman in Timnah; now get her for me as my wife."

 

The Match: (Yahshua)

          When it comes to the match- making phase for the wedding of the Lamb, the parallels are easily seen. Just like Abraham chose whom Isaac was going to marry. Yahshua’s Father Yahweh, also chooses, or calls whom His Son is going to marry.   

 

John 17:6  "I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word.

 

Yahshua acknowledges that Yahweh does the selection of the bride for His Son the Groom.

 

2 Peter 1:10-11 Therefore, my brothers, be all the more eager to make your calling and election sure. For if you do these things, you will never fall,

 

Peter makes it clear that our calling is an election. We know that Yahweh does the elections because of the previous verse. Paul makes this a little clearer in 1Thess 2:11-12. Here he tells us that Yahweh himself makes the call.

 

11 For you know that we dealt with each of you as a father deals with his own children, 12 encouraging, comforting and urging you to live worthy of Elohim, who calls you into his kingdom and glory.

 

Another interesting point that coincides with Yahshua’s relationship to us, is the topic of the intercessor or wedding master. We already learned that Abraham used his slave as the middleman to make all of the arrangements for Isaac. Another example of an intercessor or middleman however is found in the book of John. This refers to the wedding in which Yahshua reluctantly performed his first miracle by converting water into wine. Shortly after He does that, he asked the servants to present it to the master of the banquet.

 

John 2:8-10 Then he told them, "Now draw some out and take it to the master of the banquet."

They did so, 9 and the master of the banquet tasted the water that had been turned into wine. He did not realize where it had come from, though the servants who had drawn the water knew. Then he called the bridegroom aside 10 and said, "Everyone brings out the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now."

 

So who is the Intercessor when it comes to our relationship with Yahshua? The following verses identify the Holy Spirit as being our guide.

 

1 Peter 1:12 It was revealed to them that they were not serving themselves but you, when they spoke of the things that have now been told you by those who have preached the gospel to you by the Holy Spirit sent from heaven. Even angels long to look into these things.

 

John 14:26  But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.

 

The Bride Price  & Giving of Gifts (Hebrew Custom)

 

We can see in Gen 24 that when the servant found Rebekah and he went to meet her family, he followed the custom of the day by paying the bride price and giving of gifts to Rebekah and her family. This custom essentially served two purposes; first, the groom’s family recognized the fact that the daughter would be living with the groom’s father which meant that the bride’s family was losing one member to help with the daily tasks. The other reason for this custom was that if the husband happened to put away his wife, she returned to her family and this way she would have some monetary funds to fall on.

 

Gen 24:52-53  When Abraham's servant heard what they said, he bowed down to the ground before Elohim. 53 Then the servant brought out gold and silver jewelry and articles of clothing and gave them to Rebekah; he also gave costly gifts to her brother and to her mother.

 

Notice in this next verse that Shechem makes it a point to mention that fact that he has to pay the bride price and that he has to give a gift. In other words he makes a distinction between the two.

 

Gen 34:11-12  Then Shechem said to Dinah's father and brothers, "Let me find favor in your eyes, and I will give you whatever you ask. 12 Make the price for the bride and the gift I am to bring as great as you like, and I'll pay whatever you ask me. Only give me the girl as my wife."

 

In Exodus we find that Yahweh requested that the custom of paying the bride price be continued by the Israelites.

 

Ex 22:16 "If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife.

 

The Bride Price and Giving of Gifts (Yahshua)

 

As I just alluded to earlier, Yahweh Himself implemented the custom of offering the bride price. It comes as no surprise then, that we see many verses that make a reference to the bride being bought at a price. That price of course was Yahshua’s sacrifice.  

 

1 Cor 6:19-20 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from Elohim? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor Yahshua with your body.

 

1 Cor 7:23  You were bought at a price; do not become slaves of men.

 

In 1 Peter 1:18-20 we see that Peter is very direct when discussing exactly what was paid and why. Notice that he makes a reference to the currencies (gold & silver) that were used in the payment of the bride.

 

For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your forefathers, 19 but with the precious blood of Yahshua, a lamb without blemish or defect. 20 He was chosen before the creation of the world, but was revealed in these last times for your sake.

 

Along with the bride price being paid as the ultimate sacrifice, we also receive many other gifts from the Father. The gifts given to us through His Holy Spirit are to help us: edify one another, glorify the son and worship the Father.

 

Acts 1:7-8 8 But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you;

1 Cor 2:10 10 but Elohim has revealed it to us by his Spirit.

 

1 Cor 7:7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from Yahweh; one has this gift, another has that.

 

Rom 12:5-8  We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man's gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith. 7 If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; 8 if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it is contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy, let him do it cheerfully.

 

The Marriage Contract

 

Although not mentioned in Scripture, the marriage contract or Ketubah (Hebrew) was essentially a written contract or covenant of marriage. It listed the rights of the bride and the promises of the groom; basically they were similar to the spoken vows that we now proclaim in our marriages. I suppose that the opposite of the written contract would have been the written bill of divorcement.

 

If you consider that in the Scriptures (Bible) along with our ancestral history, we are given expectations for conduct and promises for successful living, we can safely assume that our Ketubah is in fact the entire Word of Yahweh. It is within the Scriptures that we are told about our new covenant written by the Spirit of Yahweh and signed by the Love of Messiah. That is the reason that Yahshua expects us to live beyond the letter and be subject to his Spirit of Righteousness.  Notice the interesting correlation made by Paul, regarding a written letter and the kind of life we should be living:

 

2 Cor 3:1-6  Are we beginning to commend ourselves again? Or do we need, like some people, letters of recommendation to you or from you? 2 You yourselves are our letter, written on our hearts, known and read by everybody. 3 You show that you are a letter from Messiaht, the result of our ministry, written not with ink but with the Spirit of the living Elohim, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts. 4 Such confidence as this is ours through Yahshua before Yahweh. 5 Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from Yahweh. 6 He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant-not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.

 

The Engagement Phase   

 

          The engagement phase or better yet, the betrothal period was considerably different than the engagements of today. Nowaday’s people become engaged and if in the course of time they decide not to marry they simply part ways and move on with their lives. During Yahshua’s time, and before, however that was not the case. In fact the betrothal was such a serious period that it required a divorce before it could be broken. That is because the couples were considered married even though there was no consummation until the actual wedding night. Notice the marriage like-language that is used in the following verses despite the fact that the wedding had yet not occurred:

 

Matt 1:18-19 This is how the birth of Yahshua Mashiach came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. 19 Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

 

This betrothal period is the phase that we are currently at. We become engaged to Yahshua when we receive his Name through our Baptism.  Baptism is in fact a spiritual cleansing and so we become virgin-like. Our Father would not have anyone who is not a virgin marry His Son and so at Baptism we become renewed, forgiven, and washed of our sins.  It is important that we take this period very seriously and realize that as virgins it is our responsibility to always be ready for our Groom’s return. The story of the ten virgins occurs during this period of engagement. We should all take after the five wise virgins so that when Messiah comes we will be ready:

 

Matt 25:1-13  "At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. 2 Five of them were foolish and five were wise. 3 The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. 4 The wise, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps. 5 The bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and fell asleep. 6 "At midnight the cry rang out: 'Here's the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!' 7 "Then all the virgins woke up and trimmed their lamps. 8 The foolish ones said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil; our lamps are going out.' 9 "'No,' they replied, 'there may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell oil and buy some for yourselves.' 10 "But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut. 11 "Later the others also came. 'Sir! Sir!' they said. 'Open the door for us!' 12 "But he replied, 'I tell you the truth, I don't know you.' 13 "Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour.

 

During this period of engagement it was not uncommon for the family to arrange one supervised meeting between the groom and the bride. After that, they didn’t speak to one another until the wedding date. The woman would return to her parent’s house and prepare by learning what was expected of her as a wife. The groom on the other hand, would return to his father’s house, to learn what was expected of him as a husband and also to prepare a wedding room. The wedding room was essentially an elaborately decorated room that was supposed to impress the bride on their wedding night and it was the room in which the couple was expected to live. Notice the correlation and the reference that Yahshua made regarding this custom: 

 

John 14:1-4  "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in Elohim; trust also in me. 2 In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.

 

Another interesting similarity between the marriage customs and Messiah’s wedding is that during the engagement period, it was not uncommon for friends of the groom to ask him when the wedding was going to occur. In many instances the groom would have to respond by saying that he didn’t know as his father had not yet told him. Notice Yahshua’s shocking words when discussing the hour when he would return for  his bride: 

Mark 13:3-4 As Yahshua was sitting on the Mount of Olives opposite the temple, Peter, James, John and Andrew asked him privately, 4 "Tell us, when will these things happen? And what will be the sign that they are all about to be fulfilled?"

 

Mark 13:32 32 "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.

 

The Wedding Feast

 

          The engaged couple’s climax point occurred at the wedding feast. This signaled the beginning of a new life together, a time when two would become one. In a way, when we get married, we must go through a transformation for our marriage to be successful. We must change our ways as individuals and learn to work together as one person. Similarly, our brother Paul informs us that as the wife of the Messiah, we must also go through a change. We must change from this carnal way of thinking and be transformed into spiritual beings so that we can inherit the kingdom.

 

1 Cor 15:50-52 50 I declare to you, brothers, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of Elohim, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable. 51 Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed- 52 in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed.

 

This spiritual change that we must go through is essential, as we will be standing before the Father, next to the Son, as the Bride of the Lamb. We must  strive to be there on that great and wonderful day!

 

Rev 19:6-9  Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder, shouting: "Halleluyah! For Yahweh Elohim Almighty reigns. 7 Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. 8 Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear." (Fine linen stands for the righteous acts of the saints.) 9 Then the angel said to me, "Write: 'Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!'" And he added, "These are the true words of Yahweh."

 

Halleluyah!   Deacon Hector Castillo